This is true sometime, Edwin. I will say, however, that some stories simply do not have a strong enough hook… or really any hook. It’s a problem I’ve seen in many, many screenplays. It’s also a bit subjective… but the big question is just like for any other marketing… “how is your thing [script] different?”

Re “the Hook,” when you’re working on a script that’s just about there, the hook is already there, only hinted at, mind you, not yet literally outstanding, but waiting to be discovered. Just happened to me, big time and since then I’ve been rebuilding the script in terms of a hook that would knock your socks off. The problem was I didn’t see it for what it was. Thought it was a neat way of developing one of the characters when it was actually the core to build the story around. Need help in finding a hook. Ask your screenplay.

Hi Dean,
What is there sounds good…. But I would make it longer to tell a bit more about what obstacles the young warrior faces. At what point does he have to choose between the lesser of two evils? Or between two of his values?

This gives me the nature of the story, from which I can see if it’s in the ballpark of what I’m interested in, but it’s not enough to get a yes to read it. Yep… I’d add another line or two. So far so good… But tell more.

Melody

Hi James! You can definitely make it glitzy if you know how. Just don’t use superlatives about how great it is and so forth — none of that.

If you need to use more words to really get the idea across, then don’t hold back. If you can get the hook done in fewer words, great. But oftentimes when writers try to cut it down, they cut it down too much or cut out the real hook.

Sometimes, if you have a short logline with a good hook, then the producer or agent will ask you for more info and you can elaborate into a longer pitch.

Chances are, on the loglines above, that was the main hook, but almost guaranteed, the writer/producer told more to the money people to get them to read it.